dead mens honor

I will never be here again…. This misery of choices take me under the world and show me the hell in which I could never die

Wonderful pain fill them out   I could believe my eyes but the thing is so big and too complicated  to become peace  with this silent lie 

The same eyes the same voice, the same nice choice in this outer heaven

But my will go on in me reflect me and never destroy me to get in my head to beat  your fury

I wish it was but I think it never been

Never say the right words  no one  is able to do

My last choice had been destroyed everything of me, everything in me

What have I become?

The only thing I know just yet :

It is better to run, the fight would be my death.

Well, who is this dead men walking?

And what will he do with my mindless body?

If  he is god himself, he has a damn hurting kind of  test

And prisoned in my own brain I’ am not able to change  his way for me…(!)

Not even to ask for help or something like that

They where only the painkillers to bring me through this horrible nights

And shut up the drumming inside my head, it was the guilty makes me freeze!

Daydreams made my day before

An the same daydreams make me sleepless tonight

To tired to go on

But to far to givin up while counting the steps till here.

I’m still counting, although I guess I’fe forgotten the numbers…